So I'm buying my wife a machete for her birthday (Yes, she asked for one. Yes, it will be a surprise - she doesn't read this journal). And I go down to the local Sears:
ME: Do you carry machetes?
Salesbeing: No we don't. They're too dangerous.
ME: Excuse me?
Salesbeing: A maniac could hurt people with one.
ME: But you sell chainsaws.
Salesbeing: Well, yes, but they don't have any GAS in them.
So if you're a maniac planning to rampage through a Sears, remember to bring your own gas.
That Time I Didn't Die - 2018 continues to be the year I didn't die! Too early to call it? Screw that. I spent last weekend in Tacoma General Hospital's intensive care unit (ICU). ...
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